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Twenty-Third Column
Tonight my twenty-third column was broadcast in Gendertalk #530.
You can find the complete program in the Gendertalk archive.
Or you can find just my column at:
http://eveliensnel.nl/audio/INTER12.mp3
A full transcript of the text is below:
For a long time I thought applying for a new job was out of the question for me. Everywhere I went, people made a problem of the way I looked. But lately this is steadily improving. I have learned a lot about clothing and make-up. I have had one year of speech therapy. Taking hormones, laser hair removal and sessions at the beautician’s have made my face look a lot more feminine. And now that I even have modern, dignified clothing, there can’t be any obstacle in the way, can there?
So I decided to try my luck. I sent my resume to an interesting company and I was invited for an interview. So it was time for a historic moment: My first job interview as a woman. I was not too nervous, less nervous than I used to be for job interviews in the past really, because I feel more happy with myself now.
The receptionist reacted very normally, as if there was nothing special to see about me and in the interview with the recruiter (a woman fortunately) the subject of transsexuality wasn’t discussed at all initially. She talked about the history of the company and about the kind of work they are doing. And I spoke about my technical, process-oriented and management experiences.
But an interview like this always moves on the a more personal level at one point or another. She asked me: “Is there anything in your life you would do differently if you got a chance to do it all over again?” That is of course a very smart question to find out about the weak spots of a candidate.
I thought this was a good opportunity to bring the subject of my gender dysphoria into the discussion, so I replied: “Yes, you have no doubt noticed something special about me: I have changed from living as a man to living as a woman. I should have done that much earlier.” A very clever response, if I may say so myself: I had countered her difficult question by mentioning a mistake I had corrected already, I had indicated that I was happy about my current situation and I had brought up this dangerous subject without using a word that has “sex” in it.
Well yes, she had noticed something about me, but personally she wasn’t bothered by that. And she realized that someone who can handle such a dramatic change in life must have a strong personality.
Of course she needed to know more about my transition status, so we talked some more about that, but she didn’t try to ask for too personal details. She also said I was doing very well amd looking quite natural. She complimented me on my clothing and my voice.
Our conversation ended in a very pleasant atmosphere. Now we will have to wait and see whether I will be invited for a second interview.
But even if there won’t be a second interview, I have already gained a lot with this action: It has increased my self-confidence. Even in my current job this can be useful: I have learned I am not as dependent on my current employer as I thought I was: If they give me too hard a time, I can simply take another job. In other words I don’t have to let them sit on me!
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